And I Thought Artists Were Bad . . .

Warning: The following blog post contains harsh realities some authors might find disturbing. These realities may cause nausea, spontaneous crying, upset stomach, hurt feelings, and a desire to beat me up.

I went to art school for two years and have a lot of artist friends. I had heard that artists were temperamental, and found that to be true. Artists have a hard time being objective about their work and taking criticism. They are also slow to praise other’s work, choosing instead to point out any flaws regardless of how small and unnoticeable they may be. Whenever I talk to my artist friends, I have to be very careful to be overly generous with my compliments of their work so as to not offend them. I also have to sit back and let them dominate the conversation about how wonderful they are and how impressive their work is for the same reason.

Recently someone added me to a group of Indie writers on Facebook. My first thought was, “Boy, that was really thoughtful of someone to include me. And what a great idea to create a place where we could all get together and help each other out.”

Then I started reading the posts and realized that while artists are temperamental, writers are much, much worse.

Types of Posts

Reading the wall and posts of the Indie group, I realized there were three basic categories:

1) Self-promotion

2) Complaining, blaming, and whining

3) Actual questions about how to do something or what works best

The group was set up for the third type. I can understand a little of the first two, but they seem to monopolize the majority of the wall with the third type only getting a little exposure and responses to them being more of the first two. While I see self-promotion on such a forum is a waste, because only authors post there, and authors are too busy with their own works to buy and read yours, I want to address the second type: the complaints, the blames, and the whines. For some reason, Indie authors think they are masters of the written word and all they have to do is publish a book and millions will rush to buy it. When that doesn’t happen, they start to point fingers, place blame, and more. And I thought artists were bad!

Reality Check

There are a few things an indie author needs to understand:

1. 90% of professional authors who are published by major, national publishing houses do NOT make enough money to live on. They either need a second job, a husband who earns enough to support them, or both. These are people with professionally designed covers, professionally edited manuscripts, and nationwide marketing, and 90% of them can’t make a living at it. You have a better chance making a living as an artist than a writer, and how many artists do you know that make a good living?
2. Tens of thousands of books are published each year, and less than a thousand are profitable. Those are terrible odds.
3. J. K. Rowling (Harry Potter) and Stephanie Meyer (Twilight) are flukes; their success should have never happened. Their stories need the same disclaimer as diet product commercials: results not typical. I can almost guarantee that your book will never sell a fraction of what theirs do.

What This All Means

So what is the point of all this bad news? Am I trying to discourage other authors from publishing? No, I think everyone who has a story to tell should tell it and put it out there for the world to read. But they need to realize that for most people, writing will never be more than a hobby and should approach it as such. True, some people can turn it into a living, but they are FEW AND FAR BETWEEN. If you write because you love it and have stories to tell, you will be happy. If you write expecting to be rich and famous, you are setting yourself up for disappointment.

So please stop complaining when your first novel doesn’t sell a million copies in two weeks and blaming everyone but the real culprit: yourself.

• Most likely you spent very little (if anything) on the cover, and a good cover and book description will do more to sell books than almost anything else. If you don’t have money for a decent cover or an artist friend that can do one for free, wait to publish your book until you do.
  
• “If you build it they will come” is a line from a movie, not a prophesy of success. Just because you publish it doesn’t mean people will buy it. You need to MARKET your work. (And by market I mean to readers, not other authors, because as I said before, they aren’t going to buy your book.) And marketing is a process over months and even years, not a one time thing you can do in five minutes.
• Don’t blame Amazon; they aren’t trying to sabotage you. They don’t have a grudge against Indie authors–if they did they would never provide their FREE publishing tool and let anyone sign up and publish anything they wanted to do. Amazon runs a business, and as such are trying to make money. Indie Books are not very profitable compared to national bestsellers, so of course the national bestsellers are going to get more exposure–Amazon would be absolutely foolish to do otherwise.
• Realize that your first book isn’t selling because it isn’t very good. (I know you worked hard on it and it means a lot to you; it’s like your kids–you may think they’re beautiful but the rest of the world doesn’t.) Writing is hard, and good writing takes years of work to develop. Your first attempt is not going to be perfection. Some people will buy it and like it. (One of my favorite movies is The Spirit, and while I recognize the plot is convoluted, the acting terrible, the script silly, there is something about it I love and I watch it weekly.) But don’t confuse that for thinking you are great and everyone else just doesn’t get it. While that may be true, it’s more likely YOU don’t get it. Hire an editor. Let someone who doesn’t care about your feelings read it. Get objective feedback and don’t take it personally. Be ready and willing to change your book.

So the next time your book goes a day without sales after a week of 2 per day, realize that is the nature of the beast and restrain yourself from posting about it. (And while you’re at it, spend more time working on your writing and less time on Facebook.)

Jeff Thomason